Is It Love?

“Question: Is it love or just about sex?

Answer: Close your legs long enough and you’ll find out”

I know I’m insecure and can be quite needy at times but surely everyone else suffers from this at some point or another? However, my worry is that I keep attracting the worst kind of guys. I’m not just talking about the ones that are lazy and are addicted to video games. I’m talking about the ones with drug addictions, commitment issues, ‘woman-hating’ tendencies or just the typical self-absorbed asshole. I do admit that I’m not averse to sleeping with someone I’ve just met on the first date but that is purely an expression of my sexual freedom. This is the 21st century and I refuse to be restricted by old belief systems or made to feel ashamed about having a very active sex life. 

So what am I doing wrong then? Could it be the websites and apps that I’m using? I’ve used Tinder quite a few times but all the men seem to care about is sex. I don’t mind as long as they’re willing to have a conversation afterwards but they usually tend to fall asleep after intercourse or be in a rush to leave. It wouldn’t be all that bad if the sex was at least good 90% of the times but I can barely remember the last time I had a memorable experience with someone I found on this app. Actually, I’m telling a lie. I did have a memorable experience but one that I’d rather forget. The guy was so terrible that he climaxed before his boxers hit the ground. To add insult to injury he was quite clingy and was already talking about starting a family when we only knew each other for 10 mins. He also got so comfortable that he seemed to want to take up permanent residence in my bedroom. It also didn’t help that he lived within a ten mile radius of my flat. Let’s just say I had to lay low for a whole month before it dawned on him that I really wasn’t interested. 

Eventually, I decided to resort to dating websites. I really liked the idea that besides seeing only a picture, there was actually additional info that gave you a clue about who you were dealing with. The algorithms which calculated compatibility levels was also a nice touch. So it didn’t take long before I was reaching out to any and everyone that struck my fancy. Majority replied but a few didn’t care to follow up after viewing my profile. No problem, I already had quite a few to work with. The problem was, the list started to dwindle considerably once I weeded out all those who were married, in prison or still in a relationship. The list grew even smaller once I eliminated those with  fake profile pictures or fake accounts. So in the end, I only had 3 potentials left out of a list of over 20. That was still respectable, right?

Author: DivineB-U-Ti

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